RED 4 Me!

Thank you to all of you who went RED in my behalf. Having PPCM (Peripartum Cardiomyopathy) has not only affected me, but I am realizing it has effected my little family and my friends. Lately I have had a really, REALLY hard time with the fact that I can't have more children because of this wonderful *yes, being sarcastic* heart disease. I think if I didn't have the gospel in my life, and the feeling that I am just a tool in Heavenly Father's plan than I really would be much worse off. Thomas S. Monson always talks about HOPE. I feel like everyday it's because of Hope that I can move on. I have had 9 miscarriages, most of you know this, so when I think of those babies, and being able to raise them one day gives me HOPE. When I feel despair, and angry friends call and give me HOPE for a better outlook. This month was Really hard for me last year. It was the month of my "official" diagnoses. It was the month that started me on bed rest for almost a year, and now it's a month I look back on and think... if I can make it through that, I can make it through anything!

So thank you friends for keeping me company along this journey, it's not over yet. My EF rate is still low, but I feel better since the recent weight loss. One day my kids will be old enough to understand all of this, and if they ever look back and read this blog I hope they know that what they have been through has been amazing, and all three have given me lots of HOPE and strength! My husband and parents have helped me every step of the way along with all of you, my friends! I HOPE for a much better year! Love barb


My family in Red, what a good lookin' family.


Me and the girls


I love my little man. What a hunk!